How many ____ does it take to change a light bulb < post them here

[Not_An_Abba_Fan]

Q. How Many Dogs Does It Take to Change A Light Bulb?

A1. Golden Retriever: The sun is shining, the day is young, we've got our
whole lives ahead of us, and you're inside worrying about a stupid
burned out bulb?

A2. Border Collie: Just one. And then I'll replace any wiring that's not
up to code.

A3. Dachshund: You know I can't reach that stupid light bulb!

A4. Rottweiler: Make me.

A5. Boxer: Who cares? I can still play with my squeaky toys in the dark.

A6. Labrador: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can
I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!

A7. German Shepherd: I'll change it as soon as I lead these people from
the dark, check to make sure I haven't missed any, and make just one
more perimeter patrol to see that no one has tried to take advantage of
the situation.

A8. Jack Russell Terrier: I'll just pop it in while I'm bouncing off the
walls and furniture.

A9. Old English Sheep Dog: Light bulb? I'm sorry, but I don't see a light
bulb?

A10. Cocker Spaniel: Why change it? I can still pee on the carpet in the
dark.

A11. Chihuahua: Yo quiero Taco Bulb.

A12. Pointer: I see it, there it is, there it is, right there ...

A13. Greyhound: It isn't moving. Who cares?

A14. New Zealand Sheep Dog: First, I'll put all the light bulbs in a
little cluster...

A15. Toy Poodle: I'll just blow in the Border Collie's ear and he'll do
it. By the time he finishes rewiring the house, my nails will be dry.

The Cat's Answer: "Dogs do not change light bulbs. People change light
bulbs. So, the real question is: How long will it be before I can expect
some light, some dinner, and a massage?"

ALL OF WHICH PROVES, ONCE AGAIN, THAT WHILE DOGS HAVE MASTERS, CATS HAVE
STAFF.

[capitalgainz]

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

1 to move it to the Lighting section

2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section

7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

5 to flame the spell checkers

3 to correct spelling/grammar flames

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum

11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum

36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"

5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again

[VZImpulseSS]

hahahaha...just found this as well...

How many women with pms does it take to change a light bulb?
One. Only one!! And do you know why it only takes one? Because no one
else in this house knows how to change a light bulb. They don't even
know the bulb is burned out. They would sit in this house in the
dark for three days before they figured it out. And once they figured it
out they wouldn't be able to find the light bulbs despite the fact
that they've been in the same cupboard for the past seventeen years. But
if they did, by some miracle, actually find the light bulbs, two days
later the chair that they dragged from two rooms over to stand on
to change the stupid light bulb would still be in the same spot!! And
underneath it would be the crumpled wrapper the stupid @*!#$% light
bulbs came in! Why?! Because no one in this house ever carries out
the garbage!! It's a wonder we haven't all suffocated from the piles
of garbage that are 12 feet deep throughout the entire house. The
house!! It would take an army to clean this... I'm sorry...what did
you ask me?

hahahahahahaha!!!! Win!!!

[detox_nath83]

how many EMO'S does it take to change a light bulb..???

None they just sit in a dark corner and cry.

[HuskeyVR]

1 to change the light bulb and to post that the light bulb has been changed

14 to share similar experiences of changing light bulbs and how the light bulb could have been changed differently

7 to caution about the dangers of changing light bulbs

1 to move it to the Lighting section

2 to argue then move it to the Electricals section

7 to point out spelling/grammar errors in posts about changing light bulbs

5 to flame the spell checkers

3 to correct spelling/grammar flames

6 to argue over whether it's "lightbulb" or "light bulb" ... another 6 to condemn those 6 as stupid

2 industry professionals to inform the group that the proper term is "lamp"

15 know-it-alls who claim they were in the industry, and that "light bulb" is perfectly correct

19 to post that this forum is not about light bulbs and to please take this discussion to a lightbulb forum

11 to defend the posting to this forum saying that we all use light bulbs and therefore the posts are relevant to this forum

36 to debate which method of changing light bulbs is superior, where to buy the best light bulbs, what brand of light bulbs work best for this technique and what brands are faulty

7 to post URL's where one can see examples of different light bulbs

4 to post that the URL's were posted incorrectly and then post the corrected URL's

3 to post about links they found from the URL's that are relevant to this group which makes light bulbs relevant to this group

13 to link all posts to date, quote them in their entirety including all headers and signatures, and add "Me too"

5 to post to the group that they will no longer post because they cannot handle the light bulb controversy

4 to say "didn't we go through this already a short time ago?"

13 to say "do a Google search on light bulbs before posting questions about light bulbs"

1 forum lurker to respond to the original post 6 months from now and start it all over again

ME TOO!!

[DAVIDC]

How many mexicans does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

a million and one. One to screw in the light bulb and a million to flea to america!


Hahaha I laughed at this.

[Zarconia]

How many dirty stinkin' apes does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

Three. One dirty stinkin' ape to screw in the light bulb, and two dirty stinkin' apes to throw feces at each other!

[DJ-Bolan]

Q: How many gym-junkies does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two; One to screw in the light blub and one to tell him how 'beef' he looks whilst doing it!

now that's a good one xD

[DJ-Bolan]

Q: How many anorexic does it take to screw in a light bulb?
A: Two; One to screw in the light blub and one to tell him how skinny she looks whilst doing it!

bit mean, but in hindsight it's funny!

[Darcon666]

How many Chuck Norris's does it take to screw in a lightbulb?

None... Chuck doesn't need lights to kick anyones a55.

[commoVT]

how many juvenile offenders does it take to finish a crossword?
10..... 1 do get his mum to do it because he cant spell, and the other 9 to beat the shit out of him

[detox_nath83]

^^hmmmm fail.... Where is the lightbulb?

[commoVT]

^^ hmmmmmmmm ..... maybe i want to be different

[brownie82]

[QUOTE=Not_An_Abba_Fan;1220062]Q. How Many Dogs Does It Take to Change A Light Bulb?

A6. Labrador: Oh, me, me!!!!! Pleeeeeeeeeze let me change the light bulb! Can
I? Can I? Huh? Huh? Huh? Can I? Pleeeeeeeeeze, please, please, please!

QUOTE]

How true, how true....

How many engineers does it take to change a light bulb?

None - According to my calculations, the problem doesn't exist.



How many Australians does it take to change a light bulb?
A: Twenty-one. One to hold the bulb and twenty to drink beer until the room starts spinning.


How many ADD kids does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
A: Wanna go for a bike ride?

[TrikkBen]

^^ hmmmmmmmm ..... maybe i want to be different

Different... Don't rip off Angry Boys then....

Different would be:

How many men does it take to open a beer?
None. Should be open when She give is to you.