Take the words back....

[Lish]

Have you ever spoken and wished that you could immediately take the words back or that you could crawl into a hole?


I walked into a hair salon with my husband and three kids in tow and asked loudly, "How much do you charge for a shampoo and a blow job?" I turned around and walked back out and never went back. My husband didn't say a word. He knew better.

I was at the golf store comparing different kinds of golf balls. I was unhappy with the women's type I had been using. After browsing for several minutes, I was approached by one of the good-looking gentlemen who works at the store. He asked if he could help me. Without thinking, I looked at him and said, "I think I like playing with men's balls."

My sister and I were at the mall and passed by a store that sold a variety of candy and nuts. As we were looking at the display case, the boy behind the counter asked if we needed any help. I replied, "No, I'm just looking at your nuts." My sister started to laugh hysterically, the boy grinned, and I turned beet-red and walked away. To this day, my sister has never let me forget.

Have you ever asked your child a question too many times? My three-year-old son had a lot of problems with potty training and I was on him constantly. One day we stopped at Taco Bell for a quick lunch in between errands. It was very busy, with a full dining room. While enjoying my taco, I smelled something funny, so of course I checked my seven-month-old daughter, and she was clean. Then I realized that Danny had not asked to go potty in a while, so I asked him if he needed to go, and he said, "No." I kept thinking, "Oh Lord, that child has had an accident, and I don't have any clothes with me." Then I said, "Dan! my, are you SURE you didn't have an accident?" "No," he replied. I just KNEW that he must have had an accident, because the smell was getting worse. Soooooo, I asked one more time, "Danny, did you have an accident?" This time he jumped up, yanked down his pants, bent over and spread his cheeks and yelled. "SEE MOM, IT'S JUST FARTS!!" While 30 people nearly choked to death on their tacos laughing, he calmly pulled up his pants and sat down. An old couple made me feel better by thanking me for the best laugh they'd ever had!

[reecey]

LOL!!!!!! cant help but laugh when people your with say things like these.

[sixshooter]

You need to rig that fart joke up again on tape and send it to funny video's... I bet you'd win a major prize !!! LOL

[sixshooter]

* this just reminds me of when I was ordering food from a Hungry Jacks drive through.

the waitress says to me "Would you like to eat here or take away?" rofl

[Lish]

yer thanks- I'm gunna park up right here and eat it now! PMSL

[INSINR8R]

we have taco bell in perth?

[coolngroovy]

My young bloke, he was 5, had just came back from a trip with granddad.[ silly old pom].
We were in a crowded supermarket ordering food. The mrs had taken a tray over to our table so the kids could start eating, i was still at the counter getting the last of our order. Master 5 yells at me from across the crowded room "where's my fork & knife?"

[Shounak]

I had a pretty funny incident a few months ago workin at KFC.. Two well dressed women about 30-35 walk in and think about what they're going to order.. They look pretty similar and are oredering together..

I ask them if they're sisters.. One of em says, "No, we're just a bunch of working girls"..

I just gave a half grin, her friend burst out laughing and she went bright red..

[i_want_kw]

my old lady works at national bank, a whle back she was doing some business banking and asked a customer 'is this a pre-arenged erection'
sad thing is he didnt see the funny side

n i have trouble at kfc lol, i always stuff up when saying "sweet chilli twister"
i get nervous n say it really fast n it comes out wrong
tweet chilli sister or somethin