Ground Control

[soyaman]

AVIATION HUMOUR

For all you aviation fans ... Who says pilots and controllers have no sense
of humour? Following are accounts of actual exchanges between airline and
control towers from around the world.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

During taxi, the crew of a US Air departure flight to Ft. Lauderdale, made a
wrong turn and came nose to nose with a United 727. The irate ground controller
(a female) lashed out at the US Air crew screaming, "US Air 2771, where are
you going? I told you to turn right on "Charlie" taxi way; you turned right
on "Delta". Stop right there. I know it's difficult to tell the difference
between C's and D's but get it right."

Continuing her lashing to the embarrassed crew, she was now shouting
hysterically, "God, you've screwed everything up; it'll take forever to sort
this out. You stay right there and don't move until I tell you to. You can
expect progressive taxi instructions in about a half hour and I want you to go
exactly where I tell you, when I tell you, and how I tell you. You got that,
US Air 2771??"

The humbled crew responded: "Yes Ma'am".

Naturally, the "ground control" frequency went terribly silent after the
verbal bashing of US Air Flight 2771. No one wanted to engage the irate ground
controller in her current state. Tension in every ****pit at LGA was running
high. Shortly after the controller finished her admonishment of the U.S. Air
crew, an unknown male pilot broke the silence and asked, "Wasn't I married
to you once?"

[nicholasjoe]

haha good one