Chuck Norris

[kojamoz]

Chuck norris' tears are the cure for Cancer, but he never cries.
Chuck norris can win a game of connect 4 in only 3 moves.
Chuck norris doesn't take showers, he only takes blood baths.
Chuck Norris has counted to infinity. Twice.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
There is no chin behind Chuck Norris' beard. There is only another fist.
There are no steroids in baseball. Just players Chuck Norris has breathed on.
When Chuck Norris falls in water, Chuck Norris doesn't get wet. Water gets Chuck Norris.
When Chuck Norris has sex with a man, it won't be because he is gay. It will be because he has run out of women.

[jack.mc]

Wilt Chamberlain claims to have slept with more than 20,000 women in his lifetime. Chuck Norris calls this "a slow Tuesday."

Chuck Norris does not go hunting because "hunting" implies a chance of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.

Outer space exists because it's afraid to be on the same planet with Chuck Norris.

Chuck Norris doesn't read books. He stares them down until he gets the information he wants.

There is no theory of evolution. Just a list of creatures Chuck Norris has allowed to live.

http://www.chucknorrisfacts.com/page1.html

White Goodman: [a hyper-obese White watches the commercial for Average Joe's before turning off the TV in disgust] Spare me... I won that tournament... ****in' Chuck Norris!

[Sensations Evil Twin]

I guess chuck is the man then huh?

[VS Omega]

Chuck Norris himself reading these facts out:

http://www.spikedhumor.com/articles/...ris_Facts.html

[killuminati]

http://www.compfused.com/directlink/1276/