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  #1  
Old 20-05-2006, 12:29 AM
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Brain function fading .
 

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1. On a blanket from Taiwan
NOT TO BE USED AS PROTECTION FROM A TORNADO.


2. On a helmet mounted mirror used by US cyclists
REMEMBER, OBJECTS IN THE MIRROR ARE ACTUALLY BEHIND YOU.


3. On a Taiwanese shampoo
USE REPEATEDLY FOR SEVERE DAMAGE.


4. On the bottle-top of a (UK) flavoured milk drink
AFTER OPENING, KEEP UPRIGHT.


5. On a New Zealand insect spray
THIS PRODUCT NOT TESTED ON ANIMALS.


6. In a US guide to setting up a new computer
TO AVOID CONDENSATION FORMING, ALLOW THE BOXES TO WARM UP TO ROOM TEMPERATURE BEFORE OPENING.

(Sensible, but the instruction was INSIDE the box.)


7. On a Japanese product used to relieve painful haemorrhoids
LIE DOWN ON BED AND INSERT POSCOOL SLOWLY UP TO THE PROJECTED PORTION LIKE A SWORD-GUARD INTO ANAL DUCT. WHILE INSERTING POSCOOL FOR APPROXIMATELY 5 MINUTES, KEEP QUIET.


8. In some countries, on the bottom of Coke bottles
OPEN OTHER END.


9. On a packet of Sunmaid raisins
WHY NOT TRY TOSSING OVER YOUR FAVOURITE BREAKFAST CEREAL?


10. On a Sears hairdryer
DO NOT USE WHILE SLEEPING.


11. On a bag of Fritos
YOU COULD BE A WINNER! NO PURCHASE NECESSARY.
DETAILS INSIDE.


12. On a bar of Dial soap
DIRECTIONS - USE LIKE REGULAR SOAP.


13. On Tesco's Tiramisu dessert
(printed on bottom of the box)
DO NOT TURN UPSIDE DOWN.


14. On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding
PRODUCT WILL BE HOT AFTER HEATING.


15. On a Korean kitchen knife
WARNING KEEP OUT OF CHILDREN.


16. On a string of Chinese-made Christmas lights
FOR INDOOR OR OUTDOOR USE ONLY.


17. On a Japanese food processor
NOT TO BE USED FOR THE OTHER USE.


18. On Sainsbury's peanuts
WARNING - CONTAINS NUTS.


19. On an American Airlines packet of nuts
INSTRUCTIONS - OPEN PACKET, EAT NUTS.


20. On a Swedish chainsaw
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.


21. On a child's superman costume
WEARING OF THIS GARMENT DOES NOT ENABLE YOU TO FLY.


22. On some frozen dinners
SERVING SUGGESTION DEFROST.


23. On a hotel provided shower cap in a box
FITS ONE HEAD.


24. On packaging for a Rowenta iron
DO NOT IRON CLOTHES ON BODY.


25. On Boot's "Children's" cough medicine
DO NOT DRIVE CAR OR OPERATE MACHINERY.


26. On Nytol sleep aid
WARNING MAY CAUSE DROWSINESS.


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  #2  
Old 20-05-2006, 08:51 AM
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.
 

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lol some of those are classic, sad to see that companies have to put these labels on
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  #3  
Old 20-05-2006, 03:26 PM
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the sad thing is each of these probly results from some stupid yank suing them
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  #4  
Old 20-05-2006, 05:27 PM
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LPG Installer :p
 

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One that's on my bike:

DO NOT RIDE BIKE UNLESS PEDALS ARE ATTACHED

or sumfing along those lines
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  #5  
Old 21-05-2006, 12:10 AM
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whats wrong with 5 ? insects arent animals
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  #6  
Old 24-05-2006, 07:05 PM
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yep.....
 

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technically, yes they are.

All very funny, and yeah some yank probly did sue
Quote:
Originally Posted by Pretender
[b]20. On a Swedish chainsaw
DO NOT ATTEMPT TO STOP CHAIN WITH YOUR HANDS OR GENITALS.
they are that stupid aren't they?
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  #7  
Old 24-05-2006, 08:46 PM
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There's a 'health food' mob thant puts out it's own food lines and they have Chocolate Peanut protein 'health' bars along with a warning on the back that 'This product may contain traces of nuts'

Well duuuhhh
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