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Thread: Sir Paul & the Missus

  1. #1
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    Default Sir Paul & the Missus

    Sir Paul & the Missus

    It's a very sad world we live in when Sir Paul McCartney and his wife are facing divorce and all anyone seems to want to do is make jokes about her false leg. Personally, I think it's prosthetic.

    News reports have confirmed that Paul McCartney has separated from his wife Heather Mills-McCartney. Mrs Mills-McCartney is said to be distraught over the split. "He has been my crutch for so long"! She said in an earlier briefing, "I have no idea why this has happened, I'm really stumped"

    "She's running around in circles", according to a close friend, "she will need all the support she can get. It's not like its easy to walk out on a relationship like this"

    It is not known whether a pre-nuptial agreement was signed prior to the marriage. Paul McCartney is one of the richest men in the world, and if an agreement has been signed it is believed that she won't have a leg to stand on.

    Rumours abound over the split which have suggested that infidelity may have been the cause. "She's terrible" a source stated, "always trying to get her leg over".

    Another source has suggested that her battle with alcoholism was the cause.
    "Macca couldn't handle it anymore" a friend said, "he would get home at night and find her legless"

    Many have attributed this to a problem which started with the present that Paul bought her prior to the wedding. He gave her a new prosthetic leg for Christmas but that was just a stocking-filler.

    A miner in Africa has an accident and loses a leg. He says to his mate "I'm f---ed, who will want a one legged gold digger?"
    His mate says "try Paul McCartney"

    Finally a poem by Sir Paul McCartney:
    I lay upon a grassy bank
    My hands were all a quiver
    I slowly removed her suspender belt
    and her leg fell in the river

    These jokes are funny but lets spare a thought for Paul please. Now she has left him, he's going to struggle to find another woman who can fill her shoe.

  2. #2
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    hahaha harsh

    1995 Manual HSV Clubsport
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  3. #3
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    I didn't know she was missing a leg, but I do know he could have got himself several russian wives for alot cheaper and alot less trouble than this one

  4. #4
    HoZy's Avatar
    HoZy is offline //There Ain't No Rest For The Wicked...
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    Gold!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
    Quote Originally Posted by garth
    well if it isnt mr i only have temp bans. how long you intending on staying this time hozy.

  5. #5
    Sabbath''s Avatar
    Sabbath' is offline Take it out/Take it Back
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    I bet she'd be hopping mad if she saw some of the jokes going around about her.
    Quote Originally Posted by ari666 View Post
    i have a proper update for ya:

    sabbath is not fire proof.

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    cowl on your car is like having the most epic boob job ever and then fitting 4 grandma bras over the top
    Quote Originally Posted by Jecs:
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  6. #6
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    xlr8_87 is offline No longer a commy driver
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    i so shouldn't have laughed as hard as i did at that

    i'm going to hell!
    <<<Rob>>>
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  7. #7
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    bangers is offline <<<There's a good present
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    she'd probably think of kicking your ass for those jokes but be too scared of falling over.

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