Politically Correct
FINDING IT HARD TO BE POLITICALLY CORRECT??? ...NOT ANYMORE!!!!
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT WOMEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
1.She is not a BABE or a CHICK - She is a BREASTED CITIZEN.
2.She is not EASY - She is HORIZONTALLY ACCESSIBLE.
3.She is not BLONDE - She is a DETOUR OFF THE INFORMATION SUPER HIGHWAY
4.She has not BEEN AROUND - She is A PREVIOUSLY ENJOYED COMPANION.
5.She is not an AIRHEAD - She is REALITY IMPAIRED.
6.She does not get DRUNK or TIPSY - She gets CHEMICALLY INCONVENIENCED.
7.She is not HORNY - She is SEXUALLY FOCUSED.
8.She does not have BREAST IMPLANTS - She is MEDICALLY ENHANCED.
9.She does not NAG YOU - She becomes VERBALLY REPETITIVE.
10.She is not a SLUT - She is SEXUALLY EXTROVERTED.
11. She does not have PREMIER LEAGUE HOOTERS - She is PECTORALLY SUPERIOR.
12. She is not a TWO-BIT SLAPPER - She is a LOW COST SERVICE PROVIDER.
HOW TO SPEAK ABOUT MEN AND BE POLITICALLY CORRECT:
1.He does not have a BEER GUT - He has developed a LIQUID STORAGE FACILITY.
2.He is not a BAD DANCER - He is OVERLY CAUCASIAN.
3.He does not GET LOST - He INVESTIGATES ALTERNATIVE DESTINATIONS.
4.He is not BALDING - He is in FOLLICLE REGRESSION.
5.He is not a CRADLE SNATCHER - He is GENERATIONALLY DIFFERENTIAL.
6.He does not get FALLING-DOWN DRUNK - He becomes ACCIDENTALLY HORIZONTAL.
7.He does not act like a TOTAL ASS - He develops RECTAL CRANIAL INVERSION.
8.He is not a MALE CHAUVINIST PIG - He has SWINE EMPATHY.
9.He is not afraid of COMMITMENT - He is MONOGAMOUSLY CHALLENGED.
10.He is not a WANKER - He is an OWNER OPERATOR.
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The one thing that unites all human beings, regardless of age, gender, religion, economic status or ethnic background, is that, deep down inside, we ALL believe that we are above average drivers.
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funny 1st time I read it.
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