dont feel like it

[vn chicky]

One evening last week, my girlfriend and I were getting into bed. Well, the passion starts to heat up, and she eventually says, "I don't feel like it, I just want you to hold me."
I said, "WHAT??!! What was that?!" So she says the words that
every boyfriend on the planet dreads to hear...


"You're just not in touch with my emotional needs as a woman enough for me to satisfy your physical needs as a man."


She responded to my puzzled look by saying, "Can't you just love me for who I am and not what I do for you in the bedroom?"


Realizing that nothing was going to happen that night, I went to sleep. The very next day I opted to take the day off work to spend time with her. We went out to a nice lunch and then went shopping at a big, big unnamed department store. I walked around with her while she tried on several different very expensive outfits. She couldn't decide which one to take, so I told her we'd just buy them all. She wanted new shoes to compliment her new clothes, so I said, "Lets get a pair for each outfit." We went on to the jewellery department where she picked out a pair of diamond earrings. Let me tell you...
she was so excited. She must have thought I was one wave short of a shipwreck. I started to think she was testing me because she asked for a tennis bracelet when she doesn't even know how to
play tennis.

I think I threw her for a loop when I said, "That's fine, honey." She was almost nearing sexual satisfaction from all of the excitement. Smiling with excited anticipation, she finally
said, "I think this is all dear, let's go to the cashier."

I could hardly contain myself when I blurted out, "No honey, I don't feel like it."


Her face just went completely blank as her jaw dropped with a baffled, "WHAT?"

I then said, "Honey! I just want you to HOLD this stuff for awhile. You're just not in touch with my financial needs as a man enough for me to satisfy your shopping needs as a woman." And just when she had this look like she was going to kill me, I added, "Why can't you just love me for who I am and not for the things I buy you?"

[JD]

absolute gold!

[Joey_21]

hahahahahhahah oh **** watta classic almost sounds movie like man nicecumback

[jd hot stuff]

Heard this one beofre but still a classic

[BLSTIC]

well it looks like she wont be satisfying your physical needs as a man for a long long time.

[VZTHUNDER]

lmfao thats hell good

[stes mad VT]

that sounds like my missus lol

[Astranomical]

PWND!!!!!!

[Morton]

aaaaah gold. I love it \o/