| Jokes/Humour Think something is funny? Put it in here for everyone to laugh at. |

07-09-2007, 06:48 AM
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Ride: vt acclaim wagon 3.8
Join Date: Jul 2005
Posts: 4
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How To Shower
How To Shower
HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A WOMAN
>>>> >
>>>> >Take off clothes and place them sectioned in the laundry basket
>>>> >according to lights and darks.
>>>> >
>>>> >Walk to bathroom wearing long dressing gown.
>>>> >
>>>> >If you see husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>>>> >
>>>> >Look at your womanly physique in the mirror - make mental note to do
>>>> >more sit-ups/leg-lifts etc.
>>>> >
>>>> >Get in the
>>>> >shower.
>>>> >
>>>> >Use face cloth, arm cloth, leg cloth, long loofah, wide loofah and
>>>> >pumice stone.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wash your hair once with cucumber and sage shampoo with 43 added
>>>> >vitamins.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wash your hair again to make sure it is clean.
>>>> >
>>>> >Condition your hair with conditioner enhanced with grapefruit and
>>>>
>>>> >mint.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wash your face with crushed
>>>>apricot facial scrub for 10 minutes
>>>> >until red.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wash entire rest of body with ginger nut and jaffa cake body wash.
>>>> >
>>>> >Rinse conditioner off hair.
>>>> >
>>>> >Shave armpits and legs.
>>>> >
>>>> >Turn off shower.
>>>> >
>>>> >Squeegee off all wet surfaces in shower.
>>>> >
>>>> >Spray mould spots with tile cleaner.
>>>> >
>>>> >Get out of shower.
>>>> >
>>>> >Dry with towel the size of a small country.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wrap hair in a super absorbent towel.
>>>> >
>>>> >Return to bedroom
>>>> >wearing long dressing gown and the hand towel on head.
>>>> >
>>>> >If you see your husband along the way, cover up any exposed areas.
>>>> >
>>>> >
>>>> >HOW TO SHOWER LIKE A MAN
>>>> >
>>>> >Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave in a
>>>>
>>>> >pile on the floor.
>>>> >
>>>> >Walk naked
>>>>to the bathroom.
>>>> >
>>>> >If you see your wife along the way, shake willy at her making the
>>>> >"woo-woo" sound.
>>>> >
>>>> >Look at your manly physique in the mirror. Admire the size of your
>>>> >willy and scratch your bum.
>>>> >
>>>> >Get in the shower.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wash your face.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wash your armpits.
>>>> >
>>>> >Blow your nose in your hands and let the water rinse it off.
>>>> >
>>>> >Fart and laugh at how loud it sounds in the shower.
>>>> >
>>>> >Spend majority of time washing privates and surrounding area.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wash your bum, leaving those coarse bum hairs stuck on the soap.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wash your hair.
>>>> >
>>>> >Make a Shampoo Mohawk.
>>>> >
>>>> >Wee.
>>>> >
>>>> >Rinse off and get out of shower.
>>>> >
>>>> >Partially dry off.
>>>> >
>>>> >Fail
>>>>to notice water on floor because
>>>>curtain was hanging out of
>>>> >bath the whole time.
>>>> >
>>>> >Admire willy size in mirror again.
>>>> >
>>>> >Leave shower curtain open, wet mat on floor, light and fan on.
>>>> >
>>>> >If you pass wife, pull off towel, shake willy at her and make the
>>>> >"woo-woo" sound again.
>>>> >
>>>> >Throw wet towel on
>>>> >bed.
>>>>
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07-09-2007, 08:06 AM
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0-100: 8.5
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Ride: 98 VT V6 Berlina
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: Sydney, NSW
Posts: 209
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 good one LOL
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CAR 1 98 VT Berlina V6 Sedan (traction control,1600kg towbar)  lowered 2" pedders springs/shocks/camber kit/nolathane swaybar bushes (front/rear), DIY CAI, Altezza Headlights, IPF 150 watt Globe's, 180mm Spotties  , VT Series 2 Tail Lights,Clear side repeaters  0-100: 8.5 CAR 2 96 EF Futura I6 Auto Sedan  Lowered 2" with Kingsprings, EL XR Front, 16" Tickford Wheels, 5% Tint,Hi-Flow Air Filter/XR6T Snorkle, Pacemaker 4499's/Hi Flow Cat/2.5 inch Redback  0-100: 7.6
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07-09-2007, 08:42 AM
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P.I.M.P
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Ride: VN Calais v8_mazda mx6_mazda 323 rwd_kawasaki zzr
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: Canberra
Posts: 687
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so true lol
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07-09-2007, 03:18 PM
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Ride: VR Executive
Join Date: Aug 2007
Location: Adelaide
Posts: 0
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haha love it!
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07-09-2007, 03:23 PM
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Carbon Neutral -> DO IT!
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Ride: VP 5-SPD / 24-SPD Racer Hybrid
Join Date: May 2005
Location: .....in the Valley
Posts: 1,449
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its amazing how may of those i do....
ahaha
aZk.
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07-09-2007, 11:14 PM
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VE? Very Excellent!!!
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Ride: parents' Toyota Hilux SR5 dual cab 4WD
Join Date: Apr 2004
Location: Bundy, QLD
Posts: 533
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Sounds like me. :P
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"There's nothing quite like a Holden"
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07-09-2007, 11:28 PM
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Enhanced Custom Tuned
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Ride: VZ SS Thunder MY06
Join Date: Jan 2007
Location: SA
Posts: 339
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this is true
i know people who do this :P :S
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07-10-2007, 09:27 PM
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Ride: VY SS Auto
Join Date: Jul 2006
Location: Seaford, VIC
Posts: 14
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hahahahaha this is soo like my husband hahahahahahaha too funny!!!!!!
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07-10-2007, 11:08 PM
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Ride: vt 2000 series 2
Join Date: Mar 2006
Location: adelaide
Posts: 1,144
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wohoooo sound hahahahaahahahahahaa
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never drive faster than your guardian angel can fly
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08-10-2007, 04:51 AM
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Vic's Cruise Moderator
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Ride: VR Executive II
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Glen Waverley, Victoria
Posts: 442
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haha i did majority of those in the shower this morning, girlfriend isnt usually to impressed.
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09-10-2007, 03:55 PM
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Ride: monaro cv6
Join Date: Aug 2006
Posts: 340
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yeah i did that this morning to, except my mum or my sister were not impressed either, dunno why.
johnny
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