can't help meself...lol

[rattattack1313]

THE PHAOMNNEAL PWEOR OF THE HMUAN MNID > > I cdnuolt blveiee taht I cluod aulaclty uesdnatnrd waht I was rdgnieg. > > Aoccdrnig to a rscheearch at Cmabrigde Uinervtisy, it deosn't mttaer in > waht oredr the ltteers in a wrod are, the olny iprmoatnt tihng is taht > the frist and lsat ltteer be in the rghit pclae. > > The rset can be a taotl mses and you can sitll raed it wouthit a > porbelm. Tihs is bcuseae the huamn mnid deos not raed ervey lteter by > istlef, but the wrod as a wlohe. > > Amzanig!




One day the teacher walked into the class and looked on the board and
saw the word penis written in tiny little letters. She turned and looked for
guilty faces in the class but found none. She then erased it off the
board and continued with the days lesson. The next day she walk into the class and the word penis was written in larger letters, she then turn in vain at
the class to find the culprit but found no one, so again she erased the
board and continued her class. For at least week she found the word on the
board each day getting larger then the previous day's word. Finally one day
she walked into the class expecting to be greeted by the same word but found it saying "THE MORE YOU RUB IT, THE BIGGER IT GETS"



Subject: Fw: A 100%?
Ever wonder about those people who say they are giving
more than 100%? We have all been to those meetings
where someone wants over 100%. How about achieving
103%? Here's a little math that might prove helpful.

What makes life 100%?
If:
A B C D E F G H I J K L M N O P Q R S T U V W X Y Z
is represented as:

1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 11 12 13 14 15 16 17 18 19 20 21
22 23 24 25 26.

Then:

H A R D W O R K

8 1 18 4 23 15 18 11 = 98%

K N O W L E D G E

11 14 15 23 12 5 4 7 5 = 96%
But,

A T T I T U D E

1 20 20 9 20 21 4 5 = 100%
And,
B U L L S H I T

2 21 12 12 19 8 9 20 = 103%
So, it stands to reason that hard work and knowledge
will get you close, attitude will get you there, and

bullshit will put you over the top.

But, look how far ass kissing will take you.

A S S K I S S I N G

1 19 19 11 9 19 19 9 14 7 = 118%

So the next time someone asks you to give more than
100%, you know what is required of you.

[MY_95_VS]

this is absolutely brilliant!!! How awesome is this post??? Where do they come up with this buillshit??? lol