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Old 10-03-2005, 10:02 AM
 

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rattattack1313 has disabled reputation
Cool letters to the council..

My uncle Ron works in sydney, on the council..and sent me this.....
These are 'genuine clips' from council complaint letters:

My bush is really overgrown round the front and my back passage
Has fungus growing in it.

He's got this huge tool that vibrates the whole house and I
Just can't take it anymore.

It's the dog's mess that I find hard to swallow.

I want some repairs done to my cooker as it has backfired and
Burnt my knob off.

I wish to complain that my father hurt his ankle very badly
when he put his foot in the hole in his back passage.

And their 18 year old son is continually banging his balls
Against my fence.

I wish to report that tiles are missing from the outside toilet
roof. I think it was bad wind the other night that blew them
off.

My lavatory seat is cracked, where do I stand?

I am writing on behalf of my sink, which is coming away from
The wall.

Will you please send someone to mend the garden path. My wife
tripped and fell on it yesterday and now she is pregnant.

I request permission to remove my drawers in the kitchen.

50% of the walls are damp, 50% have crumbling plaster and 50%
are plain filthy.

The toilet is blocked and we cannot bath the children until it
Is cleared.

Will you please send a man to look at my water, it is a funny
colour and not fit to drink.

Our lavatory seat is broken in half and is now in three pieces.

I want to complain about the farmer across the road; every
Morning at 6am his **** wakes me up and it's now getting too much for me.

The man next door has a large erection in the back garden,
which is unsightly and dangerous.

Our kitchen floor is damp. We have two children and would like
A third so please send someone round to do something about it.

I am a single woman living in a downstairs flat and would you
please do something about the noise made by the man on top of
me every night.

Please send a man with the right tool to finish the job and
Satisfy my wife.

I've have had the clerk of works down on the floor six times
but I still have no satisfaction.
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