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Thread: Some bad jokes I heard at work

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    Default Some bad jokes I heard at work

    Joke 1

    A man is driving along the highway in his wagon and not far behind is the RSPCA. Just just cruising along at 100km/h when out of the bushes a rabbit runs across the road infront of him. The inevitable happens and he runs over the poor rabbit. The driver of the RSPCA see this, speeds up and flashes his lights so the driver of the wagon pulls over.

    The RSPCA driver approaches the wagon driver saying 'Yeah mate I just saw you kill that rabbit, will you drive back to the scene of the crime, I will follow". Shocked, the driver of the wagon goes back to the scene and he and RSPCA official stand by the rabbit. The RSPCA official explains, "you have just killed this poor rabbit, you need to either bring it back to life or remove it."

    Quietly, wagon driver thinks for a moment then opens up his car and pulls out an unmarked spray can, which he shakes and then approaches the rabbit, spraying liberally on the rabbit.

    Instantly the rabbit springs back into life, collects his vital organs and runs back into the bushes.

    As the driver of the wagon puts the can back in the car, the RSPCA official asks, "That was amazing! How did you do that? Whats in that spray can?"

    Wagon driver replies "Hairspray."

    Badoom-tishhhh!

    Joke 2

    At this intersection in regional Australia somewhere is a Shell petrol station and a KFC. Two local cops pullover across from KFC in full view of the petrol station. One cop goes to get KFC, the other stays to man the radio.

    A woman in her Ford Focus comes to the petrol station to fill up her car. The cop watches on as the woman fills her tank. Somehow she overfills and petrol sprays all on her arm. But she's ok so the cop lets it go. By the time she's paid for the petrol and returned to her car, the other cop returns to the patrol car with KFC. The cops return to the police station, going in the same direction as the woman.

    The drive just behind her as she pulls out a smoke and goes to light it. Instantly her arm catches alight and she pulls over. The cops run out and extinguish the blaze, which was confined to her arm only. The cops then lock her car and take her to the police station to file a report and comfort her as she is clearly distressed.

    The senior sargent walks in and sits down as the two cops and the woman eat KFC together.

    The sargent says "I am sorry miss, I am afriad I will be having to charge you today."

    The woman, now shocked asks "Why sir what have I done?"

    Sarge replies "Illegal use of a firearm."

    Badoom-tish

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    you have to pull over for the rspca? lol. thats the only funny thing i saw in this thread

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    Quote Originally Posted by stocky View Post
    you have to pull over for the rspca? lol. thats the only funny thing i saw in this thread
    Like I said BAD jokes I heard at work... I do like the Firearm one though

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    EvoVIIIJDM is offline Got Evo?
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    I didnt think it was possible for a joke to fail as well as being extraordinarily lame.
    You sir have achieved this.
    Quote Originally Posted by Skitz View Post
    Go ahead with the SS badges,you will reap the benefits.

    I have put SS badges and the kit on my VE Omega and when I go cruising and rev it past the girls.........well what can I say,they have drool running down their face.I chuck a U-turn and they say ''Nice car'' and I say ''It's an SS,jump in''.

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    Maybe I should put a warning on the thread to indicate these jokes are so bad that their degree of bad will offend some viewers.

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    Hahaha, they were so bad, you kinda have to laugh. Good bad jokes though. I liked the "badoom tish" bits
    Quote Originally Posted by wikky
    As already stated, mate you're an absolute gherkin strummer.

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    the hairspray one I heard was a little different,

    Involves a rabbit thats been run over, the man jumps out sprays the rabbit, & it jumps up & hops down the road a little, stops & waves, then hops, & waves again. When questioned about what was in the spray the man says, 'hairspray, says on the can 'restores life & adds wave'

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    the second one is made better due to the detail in the story about KFC etc etc. You expect it's going somewhere and then... bang.. it doesn't.


    it's a bad joke.. and that makes it worse.. or is it better? Reminds me of a quote from Invader Zim...
    Zim: "I put the fires out."
    Tall One: "You made them worse!"
    Zim: "Worse... or better?"

    o.0
    I haven't lost my mind, it's backed up on tape somewhere

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    Quote Originally Posted by NORTI View Post
    the hairspray one I heard was a little different,

    Involves a rabbit thats been run over, the man jumps out sprays the rabbit, & it jumps up & hops down the road a little, stops & waves, then hops, & waves again. When questioned about what was in the spray the man says, 'hairspray, says on the can 'restores life & adds wave'
    I got told the rabbit joke a while back so I reckon the part about restores life and adds waves might have been in there too

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    /facepalm!

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    hahahahaa lol.. sooo lame!! but i still laughed!!

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