Some things to think about

[nicko]

EVER WONDER where we are headed...

Why the sun lightens our hair,

but darkens our skin?

Why women can't put on mascara

with their mouth closed?

Why you don't ever see the headline:

'Psychic Wins Lottery'?

Why 'abbreviated' is such a long word?

Why Doctors call what they do 'practice'?

Why you have to click on 'Start'

to stop Windows 98?

Why lemon juice is made with artificial flavour, while dishwashing liquid is made with real lemons?

Why the man who invests all your money is called a 'Broker'?

Why there isn't mouse flavoured cat food?

Who tastes dog food when it has a

'new & improved' flavour?

Why Noah didn't swat those two mosquitoes?

Why they sterilize the needle for lethal injections?

Why they don't make the whole plane out of the material used for the indestructible black box?

Why sheep don't shrink when it rains?

Why they are called apartments when

they are all stuck together?

If con is the opposite of pro,

is Congress the opposite of progress?

Why they call the airport 'the terminal'

if flying is so safe?

AND...

In case you need further proof that the human race is doomed because of stupidity, here are some actual label instructions on consumer goods.

On a Myer hairdryer:

'Do not use while sleeping'.

(Darn, and that's the only time I have to work on my hair).

On a bag of Chips:

You could be a winner! No purchase necessary. Details inside.

(The shoplifter special?)

On some frozen dinners:

'Serving suggestion: Defrost'.

(But, it's just a suggestion).

On Nanna's Tiramisu dessert

(printed on bottom):

'Do not turn upside down'.

(Well...duh, a bit late, huh)!

On Marks & Spencer Bread Pudding:

'Product will be hot after heating'.

(And you thought????...)

On packaging for a K-Mart iron:

'Do not iron clothes on body'.

(But wouldn't this save me more time?)

On Boot's Children Cough Medicine:

'Do not drive a car or operate machinery after taking this medication'.

(We could do a lot to reduce the rate of construction accidents if we culd just get those 5 year olds with head colds off those forklifts.)

On Nytol Sleep Aid:

'Warning: May cause drowsiness'.

(And...I'm taking this because???)

On most brands of Christmas lights:

'For indoor or outdoor use only'.

(As opposed to...what?)

On Nobby's peanuts:

'Warning: contains nuts'.

(Talk about a news flash!)

On an American Airlines packet of nuts:

'Instructions: Open packet, eat nuts'.

(Step 3: maybe, uh...fly Delta?)

I don't blame the company, I blame the parents for this one:

On a child's superman costume:

'Wearing of this garment does not enable you to fly'.

On a Swedish chainsaw:

'Do not attempt to stop chain with your hands or genitals'.

(Was there a lot of this happening somewhere?)

[CSP]

That's been around for at least 10 years...

[nicko]

lucky i didnt write NEW things to think about hey.

[Dayvo]

And why do hot dogs come in packs of 8 but the rolls come in packs of 6 . Also ,if carrots are good for youe eyes why does it hurt so much when you put them in ?

[jester419]

wish my chainsaw had those instructions

genitals

[Philthy]

Also ,if carrots are good for youe eyes why does it hurt so much when you put them in ?

I don't even know why I found that so funny. I think exams are messing with my head (coz you can see I'm studying so hard)