OK it's still 4 weeks away for doctors appointment to toss over the options again... Feels like the options are getting smaller and less appealing - BUT I still have options on life so I need to be happy with that.
Over the past few months I have made good progress in body and mind.. A sense of calmness has replaces sheer panic as I come to terms with what my life will be like going forward.
It's a much better picture than what I first seen, and now that I have moved on from what I thought was a great place to be, I can be happy now in my choices. It was hard to leave my home and my shed behind. But as the days roll on I have let go of it all, the desire to fix things is still there to a degree, but not as burning as it once was. That light has been snuffed out now. I have no real shed of my own to work in. I guess the time has come to let it all go!
So maybe I am just tired of cars having spent most of my life working on them and so on. I have many ideas on what I should look into and will explore some of that while in the states.
I do have a life after cancer and can see that now. Even if it's not a long haul - it will be a hell of a last ride lol !!!