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Allow Me To Translate That

Just-A-Girl

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FEMALE TRANSLATIONS:

Here's the translation of words women use, and the real meaning behind them:


(1) Fine: This is the word women use to end an argument when they are right and you need to shut up.

(2) Five Minutes: If she is getting dressed, this means a half an hour Five minutes is only five minutes if you have just been given five more minutes to watch the game before helping around the house.

(3) Nothing: This is the calm before the storm. This means something, and you should be on your toes. Arguments that begin with "nothing" usually end in "fine".

(4) Go Ahead: This is a dare, not permission. ...Don’t Do It!

(5) Loud Sigh: This is actually a word, but it's a non-verbal statement often misunderstood by men. A loud sigh means she thinks you are an idiot and wonders why she is wasting her time standing here and arguing with you about nothing. (Refer back to translation no.3 for the meaning of nothing)

(6) That’s Okay: This is one of the most dangerous statements a woman can make to a man. "That’s okay" means she wants to think long and hard before deciding how and when you will pay for your mistake.

(7) Thanks: A woman is thanking you, do not question, or faint. Just say you’re welcome. (I want to add in a clause here - This is true, unless she says "Thanks a lot" - that is PURE sarcasm and she is not thanking you at all. DO NOT say ‘you’re welcome’ . that will bring on a "whatever").

(8) Whatever: Is a woman’s way of saying F*** YOU!

(9) Don’t worry about it, I got it: Another dangerous statement, meaning this is something that a woman has told a man to do several times, but is now doing it herself. This will later result in a man asking ‘What’s wrong?’ For the woman’s response refer again to translation no. 3


Here's the translation of words men use, and the real meaning behind them:

MALE TRANSLATIONS:


(1)Nice dress = Nice cleavage!

(2)I love you = Let’s have s*x

(3)I’m bored = Do you want to have s*x ?

(4)What’s wrong = I guess s*x tonight is out of the question

(5)Can I call you sometime? = I’d eventually like to have sex with you

(6)Will you marry me? = I want to make it illegal for you to have sex with other guys

(7)I don’t think those shoes go with that outfit = I'm gay !
 

VS Omega

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