Old Colts in Oz
New Member
- Joined
- Feb 18, 2008
- Messages
- 87
- Reaction score
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- Members Ride
- VS Wagon
Pinched these from another forum:
How do you fit 54 Jews in a Renault Clio?
2 in the front, 2 in the back and 50 in the ashtray.
My wife said to me, "I'm fed up with you being so lazy, pack your bags and leave."
I said, "You pack them."
I broke up with my girlfriend today, she asked me if its really over. I told her it couldn't be more over if she started singing.
I was asked to descibe my life in a nut shell.
"Well, it's very dark and cramped."
Breaking news.....
Because of the recession, there has been some necessary corporate restructuring. The (somewhat unlikely) mega-merger has been announced between Zippo Lighters, Audi Cars, Du Pont and Dairy Farmers.
The new company will be called ZipAudiDuDa.
When someone texts me ROFL, I always imagine Scooby-Doo trying to say waffle.
Alcohol is never the answer......
Unless the question is, "What is C2H5OH?"
Walked into Sanity and the assistant said "Good morning".
I said, "You too".
He said, "Second aisle, first shelf on the left".
Funny ****er.
Need a screwdriver with a long shaft to do the job?
Let's torque.
My girlfriend told me I suffer from a lack of imagination.
I said, "Yeah? Well you suffer from a lack of imagination".
That showed her.
I just bought R Kelly's new album.
There was a sticker on the cellophane. It read, 'Please keep this rapper away from babies and small children.'
So many Michael Jackson jokes around. There are so many immature arseholes - it is what he would have wanted.
How do you fit 54 Jews in a Renault Clio?
2 in the front, 2 in the back and 50 in the ashtray.
My wife said to me, "I'm fed up with you being so lazy, pack your bags and leave."
I said, "You pack them."
I broke up with my girlfriend today, she asked me if its really over. I told her it couldn't be more over if she started singing.
I was asked to descibe my life in a nut shell.
"Well, it's very dark and cramped."
Breaking news.....
Because of the recession, there has been some necessary corporate restructuring. The (somewhat unlikely) mega-merger has been announced between Zippo Lighters, Audi Cars, Du Pont and Dairy Farmers.
The new company will be called ZipAudiDuDa.
When someone texts me ROFL, I always imagine Scooby-Doo trying to say waffle.
Alcohol is never the answer......
Unless the question is, "What is C2H5OH?"
Walked into Sanity and the assistant said "Good morning".
I said, "You too".
He said, "Second aisle, first shelf on the left".
Funny ****er.
Need a screwdriver with a long shaft to do the job?
Let's torque.
My girlfriend told me I suffer from a lack of imagination.
I said, "Yeah? Well you suffer from a lack of imagination".
That showed her.
I just bought R Kelly's new album.
There was a sticker on the cellophane. It read, 'Please keep this rapper away from babies and small children.'
So many Michael Jackson jokes around. There are so many immature arseholes - it is what he would have wanted.
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