Welcome to Just Commodores, a site specifically designed for all people who share the same passion as yourself.

New Posts Contact us

Just Commodores Forum Community

It takes just a moment to join our fantastic community

Register

Harley Davidson Jokes

Tatiana

Administrator
Staff member
Joined
Nov 30, 2003
Messages
2,487
Reaction score
403
Points
83
Location
Land of the free
Members Ride
Equinox LTZ - runs on cocaine
Q: Why do harley riders never ride faster than 50mph?

A: Any faster and they can't see where the parts fell off.

Q: Why do harley riders chrome all their parts?

A: It makes them easier to spot on the side of the road.

Q: Why did they decide to call it the “Harley Owners Group?”

A: Because the term “Special Ed” was already taken.

Q. What do you get when you have 32 Harley owners in the same room?

A. A full set of teeth.

Q: A Harley owner and a NASCAR fan get in a fight, who wins?

A: We all do!

Q- What is the most common accessory for Harleys'?

A- A pick-up truck.
 

CSP

Banned
Joined
Sep 6, 2007
Messages
1,357
Reaction score
36
Points
0
Location
Canberra
Members Ride
my car
About 50 Commoncheros flew past me on the Hume near Glenn Rowan on the weekend. It's an impressive sight to see. Not saying I'm a fan of Harleys but that sort of group makes me smile.

Oh, and some of us don't mind a bit of NASCAR Sash! :p
 

Bill44

Member
Joined
Nov 24, 2010
Messages
75
Reaction score
0
Points
6
Location
Gorokan NSW
Members Ride
VE Omega 08 MY09
Why don't Harley riders wave to other bikes?
They're too scared to take a hand off the bars.
 

jujibelly

ERROR_PATH_NOT_FOUND
Joined
Apr 28, 2009
Messages
218
Reaction score
1
Points
0
Location
Melb
Members Ride
Vr Commodore
Hahaha I'm gonna so think of that everytime a wanker harley rider doesn't say hello.
 

RIDE:42

crew chief
Joined
May 26, 2009
Messages
32
Reaction score
1
Points
6
Members Ride
vuss
Why do Harley riders have a fringe on the gloves/jacket ect?




So they can check if their moving






What dose a harley and a blue dog have in common?





both like a ride home in a ute after a short run











Why put crome on a harley?












if it don`t go fast chrome it
 

HuskeyVR

New Member
Joined
Feb 26, 2011
Messages
74
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Alaska
Members Ride
NONE
At a press conference late Monday, the CEO of Johnson Marine, makers of Johnson outboard marine engines and other recreational equipment, unveiled a new line of heavyweight cruiser style motorcycles designed to compete head to head with industry leader Harley-Davidson.

Peter Long, Johnson brands marketing manager said, "We have studied the market and determined that Harley, while highly successful, has narrowly missed the mark when targeting motorcycle buyers". Long added, "We at Johnson are convinced that our product hits the target dead center and promises to draw sales away from Harley-Davidson in a way no other motorcycle has been able to accomplish".

The new line of bikes, marketed under the name Big Johnson Motorcycles, will, according to Long, deliver what Harley has only promised. "Our research show that this, a Big Johnson, is what Harley buyers are really after".

At the unveiling of the new line Monday, several current Harley owners agreed. "When I bought my Harley, what I really needed was a Big Johnson," said one Harley owner." But I see now that riding a Harley is no replacement for having a Big Johnson."

Manager Long also said that his company would follow the lead of Harley-Davidson and cash in on a huge market for non-motorcycle related products. "We realize that not every guy can have a Big Johnson," said Long, "But image is very important to people. If they don't have a Big Johnson, they at least want to project the image of having one."

Asked if he anticipated Big Johnsons showing up in the hands of Harley owners, Long said it was unlikely. "I just don't see the need to have a Harley if you have a Big Johnson," he said. "And I can't imagine someone who spends all their resources to acquire a Harley having a Big Johnson. I think it boils down to this - You either have a Harley, or you have a Big Johnson, but you are not likely to have both." "Given the choice," said Long, "I think most guys will opt for the Big Johnson."

Another force driving sales for the company will come from women. A survey of the wives and girlfriends of nearly 1,000 potential motorcycle buyers indicates less than 5% would approve of their partner spending $15,000 on a Harley Davidson. But, when asked if they would be willing to pay the same amount of money to get their partner a Big Johnson, nearly 4 out 5 thought that would be money well spent.

One female present at the product unveiling was quoted as saying, "There is no way I will let Lonnie drop 15 grand on another one of those Harleys, but 15 grand to get him a Big Johnson? Well, that's something we could both enjoy, and it's something he really needs."
 

HuskeyVR

New Member
Joined
Feb 26, 2011
Messages
74
Reaction score
0
Points
0
Location
Alaska
Members Ride
NONE
A Honda rider, a Ducati rider and a Harley Davidson rider were all in Saudi Arabia, sharing a smuggled crate of booze after a long day’s ride. All of a sudden Saudi police rushed in and arrested them, impounding their bikes in the process. The mere possession of alcohol is a severe offense in Saudi Arabia, so for the terrible crime of actually being caught consuming the booze, they were sentenced to death! However, after many months and with the help of very good lawyers, they were able to successfully appeal their sentence down to life imprisonment.

By a stroke of luck, it was a Saudi national holiday the day their trial finished, and the extremely benevolent Sheik decided they could be released after receiving just 20 lashes each of the whip. As they were preparing for their punishment, the Sheik suddenly said: "It's my first wife's birthday today, and she has asked me to allow each of you one wish before your whipping."

The Harley Davidson rider was first in line (he had drunk the most), so he thought about this for a while and then said: "Please tie a pillow to my back." This was done, but the pillow only lasted 10 lashes before the whip went through. The Harley Davidson rider had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain when the punishment was done.

The Ducati rider was next up (he almost finished an entire fifth by himself), and after watching the scene, said: "All Right! Please fix two pillows on my back." But even two pillows could only take 15 lashes before the whip went through. The Ducati rider had to be carried away bleeding and crying with pain when the punishment was done.

The Honda rider was the last one up (he had drunk the least), but before he could say anything, the Sheik turned to him and said: "You ride a Honda. You support the greatest motorcycle and car producer in the world. I myself ride a Fireblade and have many Acuras in my fleet. For this, you may have two wishes!"

"Thanks, your most Royal highness", the Honda rider replies. "In recognition of your kindness, my first wish is that you give me not 20, but 100 lashes!"

"Not only are you an honorable and powerful man, you are also very brave" the Sheik says with an admiring look on his face.

"If 100 lashes is what you desire, then so be it. And your second wish? What is it to be?" the Sheik asks.

"Tie the Harley Davidson rider to my back." The Honda rider replied.
 
Top