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Joke of the Day

Mavericks Choice

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Just seen a claim that there are more than 60,000 illegal immigrants in Australia.
Aboriginal estimates, however, put the figure at nearly 24 million of the bastards.
 

Mavericks Choice

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VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
ece0e7e94b17eac78b7291bb35d76b9f91617ce77f7eef4ce60f3d454094013c.jpg
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
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Messages
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VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
29216018_398625350600520_5095542955091951616_n.jpg
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
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Messages
280
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Points
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Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
Those new anti-snoring pillows at Aldi are amazing. I held one over the wife's face for 5 minutes and not heard a peep from her since. ...Best nights sleep I've had in years.
 

commodore665

expat Saffa
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Location
New Zealand via Cape Town
Members Ride
2005 SV6 & Alfa Romeo 156 V6
I take my wife everywhere , but she always finds her way back
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
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Messages
280
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Points
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Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
They say women are better multi taskers than men. This isn't necessarily true. My Grandad sneezed, spat his teeth out, farted and pee'd himself, all at the same time last night, whilst eating his dinner.
 

Skydrol

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USA
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Pontiac G8 GT
We are walking downtown and this crazy homeless lady asked me if I was racist. I told her no. I hate everyone with equal passion.
 

Bradley Norton

New Member
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Vz executive
A plane passed through a severe storm. The turbulence was awful, and things went from bad to worse when one wing was struck by lightning.

One woman lost it completely.

She stood up in the front of the plane and screamed, 'I'm too young to die,' she cried. Then she yelled, 'If I'm going to die, I want my last minutes on earth to be memorable! Is there anyone on this plane who can make me feel like a WOMAN?'

For a moment, there was silence. Everyone stared at the desperate woman in the front of the plane. Then the cowboy from Texas stood up in the rear of the plane.

He was handsome, tall, well built, with dark brown hair and hazel eyes. Slowly, he started to walk up the aisle, unbuttoning his shirt as he went, one button at a time. No one moved. He removed his shirt. Muscles rippled across his chest.

She gasped...

Then, he spoke...

'Iron this -- and then get me a beer.'[/QUOTEmay as well land with a beer 2 funny
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,638
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
My boss accused me of installing a hidden camera in the women's toilet.
"How you know it was me, it could be anyone!" I told him.
"I saw you on my camera!" he replied!
 
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