Welcome to Just Commodores, a site specifically designed for all people who share the same passion as yourself.

New Posts Contact us

Just Commodores Forum Community

It takes just a moment to join our fantastic community

Register

Joke of the Day

Rocketeer

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 6, 2021
Messages
2
Reaction score
11,497
Points
78
Age
63
Location
Vietnam
Members Ride
Honda
A teacher in Detroit asked students to use "handsome" in a sentence. A student named Latisha says:

Sometimes when I be pleasin' Jamal's soul pole, my jaw gits sore, and I hafta use my handsome."
 

Rocketeer

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 6, 2021
Messages
2
Reaction score
11,497
Points
78
Age
63
Location
Vietnam
Members Ride
Honda
Dan was a single guy living at home with his widower father, and working in the family business.

Because he was going to inherit a fortune when his sickly father died, he decided to bone up on financial planning.

One evening at an investment meeting he spotted the most beautiful woman he had ever seen. Her natural beauty took his breath away.

"I may look like just an ordinary guy," he said to her, "but in just a few years, my father will die and I will inherit $200 million."

Impressed, the woman asked for his business card and three days later, she became his stepmother.

Women are so much better at financial planning than men.
 

Rocketeer

Well-Known Member
Joined
Jul 6, 2021
Messages
2
Reaction score
11,497
Points
78
Age
63
Location
Vietnam
Members Ride
Honda
My son's teacher rang me today accusing me of helping him with his sex education homework.

"Bollocks" I said. "What proof have you got?"

"Well Mr. Kay", she replied, "According to Luke, when he was asked where do babies come from, he wrote 'regrettable drunken one night stands'."
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,252
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
My mate just lost his job as a stool analyser. I have to help him financially especially after all the **** he's just been through!!..
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,252
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
Paddy and Murphy, we're going back to Paddy's house, after leaving the pub.
3am they arrive at the door, greeted by Paddy's wife, with a rolling pin in her hand.
Murphy says. "One hell of a woman you've got there. Not many women would be up, baking at this time of the morning."
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,252
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
“Have you had an accident in the last three years?” they ask... “You could claim compensation...” they continue. I phoned Claims Direct expecting to be passed on to a solicitor and a big cash payout, only to be told that drinking fifteen pints of real ale, before sneezing and following-through was ‘not an accident.’ But it’s not like I did it on purpose
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,252
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
A guy walks into a post office one day to see a middle-aged, balding man standing at the counter methodically placing "Love" stamps on
bright pink envelopes with hearts all over them.
The balding man then takes out a perfume bottle and starts spraying them all.
His curiosity getting the better of him, he goes up to the balding man and asks him what he is doing.
The man says, "I'm sending out 1,000 Valentine cards signed, 'Guess who?'"
"But why?" asks the man.
"I'm a divorce lawyer."
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
280
Reaction score
25,252
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
People complaining that there’s Christmas stuff in the shops already. That’s nothing - our local Asda is selling birthday cards, and mine is not till feckin February!!.
 

hademall

Donating Member
Joined
Jul 28, 2018
Messages
1,728
Reaction score
6,226
Points
113
Age
66
Location
Victoria
Members Ride
VF CALAIS WAGON
Statistics show, that those who have the most birthdays live the longest.
 

Skydrol

Well-Known Member
Joined
Dec 4, 2013
Messages
1,043
Reaction score
10,916
Points
113
Location
USA
Members Ride
Pontiac G8 GT
oYSaJg0.jpg
 
Top