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Joke of the Day

Rocketeer

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Joined
Jul 6, 2021
Messages
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Age
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Location
Vietnam
Members Ride
Honda
The Blonde and the Chimpanzees

A blonde lady motorist was about two hours from SanDiego when
she was flagged down by a man whose truck had broken down.
The man walked up to the car and asked, "Are you going to San Diego?"
"Sure, " answered the blonde, "do you need a lift?"
"Not for me. I'll be spending the next three hours fixing my
truck.
My problem is I've got two chimpanzees in the back which have to
be taken to the San Diego Zoo. They're a bit stressed already so I don't
want to keep them on the road all day. Could you possibly take them to
the zoo for me?
I'll give you $100 for your trouble. " I'd be happy to, " said the blonde.

So the two chimpanzees were ushered into the back seat of the
blonde's car and carefully strapped into their seat belts. Off they went.
Five hours later, the truck driver was driving through the
heart of San Diego when suddenly he was horrified! !
There was the blonde walking down the street and holding hands
with the two chimps, much to the amusement of a big crowd. With a screech
of brakes he pulled off the road and ran over to the blonde.

"What the heck are you doing here? " he demanded,
"I gave you $100 to take these chimpanzees to the zoo."
"Yes, I know you did, " said the blonde, "but we had money left
over---so now we're going to Sea World."
 

Rocketeer

Well-Known Member
Joined
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Messages
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Points
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Age
60
Location
Vietnam
Members Ride
Honda
On a train.

Sitting together on a train, travelling through the Swiss Alps, were a Kiwi
guy, an Australian bloke, a little old Greek lady, and a young blonde Swiss
girl with large breasts.


The Train goes into a dark tunnel and a few seconds later there is the sound
of a loud slap.


When the train emerges from the tunnel, the Kiwi has a bright red hand print
on his cheek. No one speaks.

The old lady thinks: The Kiwi guy must have groped the blonde in the dark,
and she slapped his cheek.

The blonde Swiss girl thinks: That Kiwi guy must have tried to grope me in
the dark, but missed and fondled the old lady and she slapped his cheek.


The Kiwi thinks: The Australian bloke must have groped the blonde in the
dark. She tried to slap him but missed and got me instead.


The Australian thinks: I can't wait for another tunnel, just so I
can smack the Kiwi again
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
278
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Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
Had a checkup last week Doctor said " Do you drink much"
I said "the odd pint why"
He said "your urine sample had a head on it
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
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Messages
278
Reaction score
9,448
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
In the eighteen years we have been married my wife has had a boob job, a nose job, dyed her hair and finally a facelift.
Yet whenever we argue, her favourite line is always,
"You're not the man I married."….
 

Mavericks Choice

Well-Known Member
Joined
Aug 29, 2007
Messages
278
Reaction score
9,448
Points
93
Location
NSW
Members Ride
VF2 SSV M6, VF2 LS3 Calais V, VZ 6L M6 Crewie
My wife joined us in the pub garden and gestured toward our son. "Why's he crying?" "He let go of his balloon and it floated away." "Ok... And why are you crying?" "I knocked over my pint when I tried to grab it.
 
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