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Joke of the Day

Mavericks Choice

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I used to have a picture of Maggie Thatcher pinned up on my wall when I was growing up, She was always a great influence for me. To be honest, I wouldn't be the great darts player I am today if it wasn't for her.
 

Mavericks Choice

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I was driving with my three young children one warm summer evening when a Woman in the convertible ahead of us stood up and waved. She was stark naked! As I was reeling from the shock, I heard my 5-year-old shout from the back seat, "Mom! That lady isn't wearing a seat belt!
 

Mavericks Choice

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My 7 year old son was looking through the family photo album and asked my wife, “Who’s this guy on the beach with you with all the big muscles and curly hair?” “That’s your father,” She replied.
"Well," he asked "Who’s that old bald-headed fat bloke who lives with us now"
 

Mavericks Choice

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60345220_650257108770675_6101515795798425600_n.jpg
 

BlackVXGTS

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I asked my wife what she thought the impact of Bob Hawke's death would have on the election.

She thought for a little while and said, "Well that's one vote the Labour party won't be getting".
 
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Mavericks Choice

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I went to the dentist for a set of false teeth.
The first day after I got my new teeth, I talked for only eight minutes.
The second day, I talked for only ten minutes.
The following day, I talked for 2 hours and 48 minutes.
My mates had to mob me to get me to shut up and They asked me what happened.

I explained the first day my gums hurt so bad I couldn't Talk for more than 8 minutes.
The second day my gums hurt too much to talk for more than 10 minutes But, the third day, I put the wife's teeth in by mistake and I couldn't shut up...
 

Mavericks Choice

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A blonde woman visits her husband in prison Before leaving, she tells an officer: "You shouldn't make my husband work like that. He's exhausted!" officer laughs, saying: Are you kidding? He just eats and sleeps and stays in his cell!" : "Bullshit! He just told me he's been digging a tunnel for months!"
 

Mavericks Choice

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aadoc.jpg
 

Mavericks Choice

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Two nuns were shopping at a 7-Eleven store. As they passed by
the beer cooler, one nun said to the other, “Wouldn’t a nice cool
beer or two taste wonderful on a hot summer evening?
The second nun answered, “Indeed it would, sister, but I would
not feel comfortable buying beer, since I am certain it would cause
a scene at the checkout stand.”
“I can handle that without a problem,” the other nun replied, and
she picked up a six-pack and headed for the checkout.
The cashier had a surprised look on his face when the two nuns
arrived with a six-pack of beer.
“We use beer for washing our hair,” the nun said. “Back at the
convent, we call it ‘Catholic shampoo.’ ”
Without blinking an eye, the cashier reached under the counter,
pulled out a package of pretzel sticks, and placed them in the
bag with the beer.
He then looked the nun straight in the eye, smiled, and said:
“The curlers are on the house.”
 

Mavericks Choice

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60565507_652477121882007_601499075904274432_n.jpg
 
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