Clients

[Jesterarts]

In a bad mood after a client meeting so thought I would share.

Here is the nutshell version:

Client: Hi, we'd like for you to make us a nice big ham and cheese sandwich abd we need it asap. How much for that?
Me: Yeah no worries, that will be $7.50
Client: Hmm... that's a bit expensive... what can we do?
Me: We can remove the cheese?
Client: We forgot to mention we also want pickle... but $7.50 is too expensive still
Me: We can not use butter, then it's $5.50
Client: Hmmm... still too much, can we remove the ham, the cheese, the butter and the bread? And we'll make it?
Me:

PS, the sandwich is a metaphor... there is no sandwiches actually being made.

 

[MasterOfReality]

Heheh we get this all the time.

Client: we want you guys to review all our geotech data, come up with a model and provide us with a mine design. Our previous consultants stuffed up and we want you to review their work too.
Me (after some consideration): no probs, thats at least 2 months work, $95k + expenses + GST
Client: WTF? Why you guys charge so much?
Me: Cos we are the best


Keep in mind, this was a client that approached us for a proposal, then rejected us as we were 'too expensive' and went with a cheaper consultancy. The cheaper consultancy made a complete balls up so the client came back to us heheh. I work for a top tier mining consultancy that produces bankable feasibility studies (ie our studies and recommendations are released to major banks, the stock exchange and management consultants like Booz & Co, McKinseys etc etc) and we charge accordingly.

 

[Jesterarts]

Yeah, client are amusing.

The most amusing thing I heard was when the looked at the quote, noticed "Project Management" and said they we can remove this because they will do that.

They couldn't understand why the PM on their side would not be capable of PM'ing our resources and processes on our side.

 

[MasterOfReality]

We find Indian clients the worst to deal with, because they do that sort of stuff like you just mentioned. Chinese are a dream to deal with in comparison.

Then they try and bargain on the price and withold payment after accepting the proposal.

We simply withold the reports

 

[wraith]

Try running a car audio shop. Na I'm not paying that much for an install. Next week. Hey I want warranty there is an error coming up (they have blown the amp in the headunit by not connecting speakers properly). Or even better "I bought this down south can you put it in". Sure full price. Customer is like why so expensive.

 

[Jezza]

a friend of mine builds websites and built a great one for his client and then because the client thought his maintenance (or whatever its called to look after it) was expensive went to someone else to get it maintained and 2 months later the website got changed and ruined by the other guy so they went back and ask my mate to fix it and if he could maintain it and he said ok but it would cost more and they asked why

 

[VKCOMMO]

Thanks Jest, Now im keen for a sandwich!

 

[ToMMMaY]

Same Situation in Tiling
Been Ripped off by alot of people
Basicly Do the job
Mosaic tiles /Skirting Etc Charge buy the Linear Mtr
Tell the Clients You know this is charged by the linear mtr....
Yer yer do it
when they recieve the bill they are all tripping thinking a linear mtr is a square mtr..
Happens without a doubt You even tell him how big a linear mtr is

 

[NV-MY-VT]

Now see, it's the opposite for me.

I work as a sys admin by day, but I freelance doing in-home computer repairs, upgrades and builds for families. My favourite thing is lippy clients who think they know best.

Like the grandparents who were told by their darling son that the i7 processor is so much better than the i3, and all they do is browse the web and check emails. They argued black and blue until they got the i7 2600K, then they needed a video card because their grandson told them it would make them be able to "do more stuff" but oh no, they wanted a Gefore 5 series. They had it written down on a post-it note.

In the end their new word processing and email PC cost them like 1400.... Idiots, but hey, I tried to tell em.

 

[greenacc]

Hey Tommy, thats even confusing me. How can mosaic tiles be charged by the linear metre when they are say in the middle of a floor or wall ? Don't you just quote them a $ figure in the beginning ?
I'm interested cos i just tiled my first floor... never had such sore legs in my life.