Cheating - Cheated On

[Jecs]

so i came across this guys post, felt guttered for him. but it got me thinking have you ever been cheated on? how did you find out? what did you do about it?

and shoe on the other foot, have you ever cheated? what made you do it?

I love my wife. With all my heart and soul. We have two beautiful children and she is pregnant with our third.

Recently my job has forced me to travel - two days on the road every other week. She has this guy friend - he's married. I just don't like him. Maybe it's because he's a good looking, fit guy. Who knows. I know they are just friends - but I can't help but get so jealous.

How can I get past this? I've told her how I feel - her response is that he is the only one of her friends without kids - so when they talk or hang out - they can have adult conversations. She likens it to me talking to my coworkers (she is a Stay At Home Mom). I get it. I love talking to friends and coworkers without kids.

I guess I just need people to tell me that I am being an idiot and I have nothing to be concerned with. It's normal for people to text all the time.

Guys and girls CAN be just friends. I truly believe that and have female friends.

Please, tell me that I'm being crazy and letting my own insecurities affect rational thinking!

I never wanted to use this throwaway again.
This morning at 0130 I looked at my wifes phone and found cold hard proof that she had been having an affair with her "friend".
I woke her and made her tell me everything. I mean everything. She doesn't know how it happened but she couldn't stop it.
I'm broken. We have a 3.5 YO, a 2YO, and she is 6 months pregnant.
I can't lose her. Even with all of this - I love her. I am furious and I feel betrayed. I feel dead inside. I took today off from work and am just sitting here staring at the wall.
She is committed to fixing it - I believe her. I heard her end things, and we agreed that I will be monitoring her phone.
She says she never lied to be about loving me. Just that something was missing and she messed up.
I am making her get an STD check today.
Sorry for the incoherent rambling.
I need a friend. I can't talk about this to anyone.

 

[mpower]

Relationships end and sometimes they end messily, it's better to have this happen that to live a long life in an unhappy marriage.

People need to build their relationships and forget all the window dressing - marriage, kids, house, etc etc - too many people get hung up on ticking the boxes and forget to be in a relationship.

 

[Tatiana]

People have affairs for a reason, there is a problem, be that a problem with the relationship or a personal issue. They can either work on fixing the problem, leave the relationship or have an affair.

I was cheated on by my then fiancée at the tender age of 18. I found them together on my 18th birthday. I cbf going into the reasons but the relationship was never a healthy one and I endured it way too long.

I have never cheated and never will. I would fix or walk away from a relationship as I think cheating is the most hurtful thing you can do to a person, no one deserves that.

 

[gopher]

Never cheated and have been with my wife for 20 or so years been married for over 13 years.
Happy in the relationship that I would never consider ever cheating

 

[commodore665]

With my job , and my wives job, comes pressure , that can and has had a impact on our marriage , but we have worked through things by being upfront and honest , and telling the other person when they are being a knob goblin (me usually ) or a bride of satan (her) . Bit of give and take and work wonders as can listening .

 

[hi_ryder]

people that cheat have too much time on their hands. i couldnt cheat even if i wanted to, between all the **** at home and work, i dont even have time to scratch my worthless balls...

 

[Darren_L]

I can never condone cheating
If one of the partners in a relationship has feelings for someone else, either they supress/get over those feelings or do the right thing by their partner and end the relationship

I've never cheated on a partner, never will. If I was ever selfish enough to do so, I could never forgive myself.
And as far as I know I've never been cheated on.

 

[luke23]

I seen something on the old facebook the other day, it said "some people will never cheat on their partner no matter how bad the relation ship is, and some people will cheat no matter how good it is" its defiantly true, it just comes down to the individual

 

[VS 5.0]

I've never cheated and as far as I know have never been cheated on.

I just hope that guy's new baby is his.

 

[Jecs]

this is going to sound wrong of me but this is why i dont like facebook. its known as a commonly used tool to communicate, and most females will tell you 'i have it to keep in contact with family'

but a majority use it to see what their ex's are doing, how they are looking, if they are dating etc. and lets be honest guy, we arent loyal to no man. given the chance to say hi to ex that youre still hung up on regardless if shes in a steady relationship we'll take it. and most girls arent no saint. they see being friendly and saying hi back wont backfire on them. even after all this time girls to still fail to understand every guy is out there to get his dick wet. and no guy is *just a friend*

Steve Harvey says it perfectly here: