nemesis_adrasteia
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i think most parents forget what they were like at that age.
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- Thread starter Shedvl
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i think most parents forget what they were like at that age.
luke23
New Member
no offence but if she waited until she was 17, thats pretty good in this day and age, i know girls that are 13-14 that go out doing god knows what(i know what they are doing but im not going to mention it), i think the best thing would be instead of scoulding her is to actually sit down and have a good chat with her, just my advice, i think it would work better then going of the handle at her
DAKSTER
Beam me up Scotty!
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My 15 year old announced tonight that she has a boyfriend. Its her first, she is so excited.
Hes known to us, hes a good kid from a good family, and she is trustworthy too. The problem is, he is 21.
I know hes a good kid, so is she. But at 21, he will have obvious expectations from his girlfriend. She insists she wont be doing anything till she is 18, but she is also desperate to be 'one of the cool kids' and an older boyfriend will do that for her.
Its scary stuff.. if he puts the pressure on and she feels she needs to do what he wants to keep her newfound social status.... no wonder I have grey hair lol
Hes known to us, hes a good kid from a good family, and she is trustworthy too. The problem is, he is 21.
I know hes a good kid, so is she. But at 21, he will have obvious expectations from his girlfriend. She insists she wont be doing anything till she is 18, but she is also desperate to be 'one of the cool kids' and an older boyfriend will do that for her.
Its scary stuff.. if he puts the pressure on and she feels she needs to do what he wants to keep her newfound social status.... no wonder I have grey hair lol
Slipper
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@DAKSTER that is just F***'ed, i think 15 and 18 would be pushing the cards a little too much but 15 and 21, what 'good' 21 year old guy wants a 15 year old girlfriend, thats questionable at best
DAKSTER
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It certainly concerns me.
This kid is known to us though, and he is a good kid, we have known him all his life. As it happens, she will also be his first girlfriend. I've already warned them both that if he touches her, he will be reported and jailed. They can be best friends for a couple years first, thats certainly what she wants, and I believe he will respect that. Its still scary.
I dont condone it, but parenting is a balancing act. You have to have a certain amount of trust in your kids, or you lose them. Once you lose them, you cant protect them anymore. All we can do is watch carefully and protect her as much as we can without alienating her.
I'm just glad she is a very intelligent, well balanced kid, who can and does make mature decisions. Peer pressure can be a powerful thing though, I think I am going to be spending far too much time watching her....
This kid is known to us though, and he is a good kid, we have known him all his life. As it happens, she will also be his first girlfriend. I've already warned them both that if he touches her, he will be reported and jailed. They can be best friends for a couple years first, thats certainly what she wants, and I believe he will respect that. Its still scary.
I dont condone it, but parenting is a balancing act. You have to have a certain amount of trust in your kids, or you lose them. Once you lose them, you cant protect them anymore. All we can do is watch carefully and protect her as much as we can without alienating her.
I'm just glad she is a very intelligent, well balanced kid, who can and does make mature decisions. Peer pressure can be a powerful thing though, I think I am going to be spending far too much time watching her....
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kuzman89
Active Member
Times have changed... It was quite common for a bloke in his mid 20's to be dating a teenager. One bloke I know got married to a 18 year old and he was 29 at the time. They'd been going out since she was 16 and he was 27!! It comes down to how physically and maturely developed they are to.
What do you guys think about 17-22? Mate of mine really likes this girl (he's a good christian kid) but concerned as shes still in year 12 and priorities are all different.
What do you guys think about 17-22? Mate of mine really likes this girl (he's a good christian kid) but concerned as shes still in year 12 and priorities are all different.
DAKSTER
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I think once they reach the age of consent, all you can do is guide them as best you can.
Plenty of married couples have much larger age gaps, of course they get together later too, when they are more mature anyway. If the 17 year old has a mature outlook, it could work. They need to make sure she finishes her education without distraction though, is he willing to support her for a few more years?
I'm inclined to think its unlikely to work more often than not, but it does work occasionally.
Plenty of married couples have much larger age gaps, of course they get together later too, when they are more mature anyway. If the 17 year old has a mature outlook, it could work. They need to make sure she finishes her education without distraction though, is he willing to support her for a few more years?
I'm inclined to think its unlikely to work more often than not, but it does work occasionally.
Hangman
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My daughter is 7. I'm not looking forward to her teen years.
My biggest issue with it is I do remember what I was like at that age...
My biggest issue with it is I do remember what I was like at that age...
hi_ryder
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im pretty sure my wife was around the same time too, but i think its more that her daughter is super immature for her age. when my wife was a teen she wasnt aloud to be around other boys unless chaperoned by her older brother. not to say she didnt get up to some shenanigans when eyes wernt on her. it was an eariler time then shes 44 now and her dad was immigrant from sicily and didnt put up with what kids get away with these days. my wife had a job at 14 too. plus my stepdaughter has a less than 50% attendance rate to a private school that were throwing our money away with. i just think if a teenager wants to live an adults lifestyle they should have some adult responsibilities of which my stepdaughter has none.... which is mine and my wifes fault.... IMO its time for my wife to pop her tit out of her daughters mouth.... were going to have a talk this weekend...