Bad Jokes!

[LightningVP]

Three women friends, one in a casual relationship one engaged to be married and one a long-time wife, met for drinks after work. The conversation eventually drifted towards how best to spice up their sex lives. After much discussion, they decided to surprise their men by engaging in some S&M role playing. The following week they met up again to compare notes: Sipping her drink, the single girl leered and said, “Last Friday at the end of the work day I went to my boyfriend's office wearing a leather coat. When all the other people had left, I slipped out of it and all I had on was a leather bodice, black stockings and stiletto heels. He was so aroused that we made mad passionate love on his desk right then and there!

The engaged woman giggled and said, “That's pretty much my story! When my fiancé got home last Friday, he found me waiting for him in a black mask, leather bodice, black hose and stiletto pumps. He was so turned on that we not only made love all night, he wants to move up our wedding date!

The married woman put her glass down and said, “I did a lot of planning. I made arrangements for the kids to stay over at Grandma's. I took a long scented-oil bath and then put on my best perfume. I slipped into a tight leather bodice, a black garter belt, black stockings and six-inch stilettos. I finished it off with a black mask. When my husband got home from work, he grabbed a beer and the remote, sat down and yelled, “Hey, Batman, what's for dinner?“

HAHAHAHAHA :yeah::yeah::yeah:

 

[hsvpunk]

Little Sanwan lives in Africa, he is poor, he hardly eats and has to ride his pushike to school each day.
His bike has a bent wheel.
So please send a $2 donation for the Dvd.

its **** funny to watch the little ****

 

[njnathan]

What does a blonde and a 747 Jumbo jet have in common

Both got Big flaps and a cockpit, and a BLACK BOX

 

[XeKToReX]

haha, these are rippers! lovin them..

I'm so emo, my wrists cut themselves.

 

[andyman]

Why did the subermarine blush?



cause it say the queen Marrys bottom


lol

 

[LightningVP]

I've always loved these ones:
A little boy and girl are sitting in a sandbox when they both stood up and their pants fell off and they asked each other "what’s that" pointing to their private parts. So they ran home and the little boy asked his father what it was and dad answered" that’s your truck, try to park it in as many garages as you can." the little girl asked her mother the same question and she said "that's your garage and don’t let any boy park his truck there." So the next day the little girl comes running home yelling "mommy, mommy a boy tried to park his truck in my garage so I knocked his wheels off."

One day there was a teenage punk-rock boy who decided to go to the local shopping mall. He had just about the craziest hair-do you could imagine. His hair was spiked into chunks all over his head, and each spike of hair was dyed a different colour. Some were green, some were red, some yellow, some purple, ECT. Well he sat down on a bench next to this old man, waiting for his friends to show up. Every time the boy looked back at this old man, he was staring at him. The boy grew angry, because this old man had such a staring problem. So the boy stood up and said to the old man: "What’s the matter, old man, huh? Never seen anybody do anything wild and crazy in their lives?"
And the old man says: "Well actually, many years back, I got drunk, had sex with a parrot and I was wondering if you might be my son."

 

[shano8]

This blonde was whipper snippering her back yard, not noticing her cat lying in the long grass, she accidently cut off its tail,"oh my god" she yelled. She quickly picked up the cat and its tail, and headed straight for Woolworths to get the cat fixed. Why Woolworths you ask........cause everyone knows that Woolworths is Australia's largest Re-tailer.....:bang:

 

[Callie6lt]

what is the difference between a truckload of sugar and a truckload of babies???

you can't use a pitchfork on sugar...


why do brides wear white???

so they match the rest of the kitchen appliances...


whats worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree???

1 baby nailed to 10 trees

 

[whitey152]

what do you do when you see a emo with there hand missing?

stop laughing and reload

 

[LUMPY 8]

how do u get 10 babys into a bucket?


use a blender