The what now thread

[Tasmaniak]

I've made the same mistake a few times now. I met a girl and all was good (we were only teenagers) lasted several years then suddenly one day, she threw a cast iron frying pan at my head. I got out quick smart.

I moved to the US and met a girl it went well, we got married then one day I came home and there was the dear john letter. I spent the next three weeks sleeping on the sofa living off of beer and bags of doritos, almost lost my job, almost lost my house because I couldn't pay the rent. After several months I perked up and needed a flatmate to help cover the bills. Thats when the sweetest woman I have ever met walked into my life. She was perfect, everything I needed. We met on Valentines day and then a few months later on Fathers day in the US she gave me the best fathers day present around. I was going to be a dad. We moved to Australia and then three months later, she announced she was returning home to San Francisco for a few weeks. Something sounded suss and sure enough, two weeks after she got back to the US she said she wasn't coming home and neither was my son. That was six months ago and I slept around for awhile after that, met another girl...funnily enough, she just accused me of cheating on her and I accused her of the same thing. I called it off about 20 minutes ago!!!! I know whats it's like dude, go out there and have some fun, but don't forget the hurt. Now, if you will excuse me, I need to goto safeway and pick-up a slab of beer and 12 bags of Doritos. The couch is calling my name.

 

[D-Man]

i dont know what it feels like since ive been single all my life (mind you it hasnt been bad... my money is my money ).

keep your head high, cause what doesnt kill us will make us stronger (i know it's cliche... but myeah) and there's nothing wrong with going out and getting drunk with mates and not picking up.

Hope it works out in the end and you move along, good luck mate.

 

[acex1138]

this track is going out to you tas - diafrix - concrete jungle

thats harsh bro. i've had an interesting run with girls, there was a huge gap between the last one and this one, wasnt married to one but had one nearly kill someone (made me back the HELL away from her quick and realise i couldnt help her) and getting used by another one and having her nearly die on me after she decided to make a stupid decision.

I still cant talk much more about hrest of that stuff. It took me a long time to get over all that. when this girl came along, i told her the worst of stuff.. and she was great, most girls who when they say that, they are too good to be true, they dont really care ur just their current guy or they are stupid.

She wasnt. i havnt heard from her today...... i kinda dont wanna talk to her. i wish something would happen and she'd call me and we'd talk.... but yeh i dont know how you can go from one week wanting you so much to the point of falling asleep in your arms, and then a week later being unsure of feelings and calling things off.

I know how much of a mofo feelings can be..... i wasnt able to feel anything for her for a long time and i was open with her about it, she'd just smile at me.

anyway guys i just put this threat up just so i could hear some other peoples thoughts. one thing that got me through one of the things i mentioned before was talking a lot with mates even if not talking about it. when stuff came out they shared stories of things happened with them. and i guess sometimes the war stories help each other out, im sure we can all find some sense of commeradary for someone here, right now im feeling for Tas.

Screw the macho bullshit, most decent guys or ones trying to be decent arent just sex charged alcohol powered losers who just care about cars booze money and snatch.

Most guys wont admit it, but inside us, theres something that just wants to feel apart of something, have that feeling of family, whether it comes from your mates, or someone you can share a connection with.

when i turned 18 i lost a close friend because she came to me and told me i was best guy she knew (my first response was, wow you just summed up all the other guys you know pretty badly then). she wanted me to have her for the night. I told her i couldnt do it we were friends, and it just didnt work with what i was trying to be as a human. She told me she wanted me to be the first, and that if i got her pregnent she'd want to keep it. I didnt know what to say, a day later told her, i had to be a good father, the only way i can be a good father is if i take care of the kid and give it a better upbringing then i had.

They had to have opportunities, i needed to support them, i needed to support their mother. she said i could do that, and she had no problem with me looking after her. I was like no..... supporting your child isnt bringing a kid into a loveless relationship. I cant do it unless i love their mother and know i always will.

yeah sounds totally christian but this was over 2 years ago and im just conveying how much i'd want to lookout for those i love. if i had a son, somoene tearing them away.... i dont even have words for losing a girl. i dont think i'd even have comprehension for something like that.

hope things turn out for you tas.

anyway this is everyones thread.

 

[Jesterarts]

*grabs beer, popcorn and puts feet up on table*

Wow... there's a developing plot, sub stories... all very interesting...

 

[acex1138]

think u can tell why i liked my life being simple and bullshit free when i was with her lol. third day without her... all this other crap is creeping back that wasnt anywhere to be seen a week ago.

 

[Vee-ard]

Your 20 and the weight of the world is on you.....harden the **** up. God forbid something really bad happens to you. Partners come and go, if your lucky to find the perfect fit then good on ya, if not play the field and shag your little ass off hahaha

The last thing he needs is you telling him to have a shot of concrete. At the risk of getting ANOTHER infraction for name calling, im gonna just say "stfu".

 

[shiftySLE]

Your 20 and the weight of the world is on you.....harden the **** up. God forbid something really bad happens to you. Partners come and go, if your lucky to find the perfect fit then good on ya, if not play the field and shag your little ass off hahaha

The last thing he needs is you telling him to have a shot of concrete. At the risk of getting ANOTHER infraction for name calling, im gonna just say "stfu".

I wasn't going to say it so harsh but geez, it sort of true, coming on here and talking about it is a great idea, as is talking to mates and whoever else but there is no need to take it so serious, the world hasn't ended, you relationship has.
I don't mean to be crude but if at 20yo or younger she said she has fallen out of love with you, then she probably never fell in love with you, she was probably just having a good time and realized there was more to life than your relationship. Not many people even know what they want at 20, you have probably been dating for 5 years.
Be upset that it has ended, if she is that important to you, try and bring her around but if you spend too much time looking at a closed door, you may miss the next one that opens.

BTW 'falling out of love' in way up there with 'I'm just confused at the moment"

 

[SV62NV]

Yeah thats true ^^

I look back now at all the great friends I have, and so many of them have come from being single, going out and just chatting with randoms.
Just go meet new people (not just going out to hook up with chicks), and you will be having an awesome time with new friends in no time

Exactly right mate, since my big change in January my self confidence has gone through the roof, when I'm at the gym or anywhere ill start a conversation with just about anyone, it's been great, I've still got me original mates who were always there and now I've got even more

 

[coolngroovy]

What is it with you guys? Are you all going to marry virgins? Good luck with that!

When you are 14,15,16....[some pple never grow out of it]...you think that the relationship you are in is going to be 'the one'. Married, 2 kids, white picket fence, happy days! Sorry to burst the bubble, but maybe 1% of relationships will turn out that way.

Dont believe me??? Try this....next time you are out cruizing with your gf/bf; & you come to a red light; turn & look at them. Odds on you aren't going to be married. Someone else will be hitting them, someone else will be having kids with them, someone else will be growing old with them. Why not just enjoy the time you both have together & let the cards fall where they may? That....is called LIFE!
The sooner you realise that, the happier you will be! Maybe it will allow you the freedom to 'enjoy' your next relationship.

We all are pre-programmed DNA robots. Some of us are sexually active earlier than others. Some of us are much more mature than others, we all want differrent things.
It;s only when 2 people, with the same values & wants meet, that things become more 'permanent'. That's the start of a beautifull lasting relationship!

What now you ask???.....enjoy the memories you have of your relationship with her, learn from the experience.....& move on! Date/dont date, it doesn't really matter. You will when you are ready.

That....my friend....is the difference between being a responsible adult, & a stalker with a AVO.

 

[Chris E]

What is it with you guys? Are you all going to marry virgins? Good luck with that!

When you are 14,15,16....[some pple never grow out of it]...you think that the relationship you are in is going to be 'the one'. Married, 2 kids, white picket fence, happy days! Sorry to burst the bubble, but maybe 1% of relationships will turn out that way.

Dont believe me??? Try this....next time you are out cruizing with your gf/bf; & you come to a red light; turn & look at them. Odds on you aren't going to be married. Someone else will be hitting them, someone else will be having kids with them, someone else will be growing old with them. Why not just enjoy the time you both have together & let the cards fall where they may? That....is called LIFE!
The sooner you realise that, the happier you will be! Maybe it will allow you the freedom to 'enjoy' your next relationship.

We all are pre-programmed DNA robots. Some of us are sexually active earlier than others. Some of us are much more mature than others, we all want differrent things.
It;s only when 2 people, with the same values & wants meet, that things become more 'permanent'. That's the start of a beautifull lasting relationship!

What now you ask???.....enjoy the memories you have of your relationship with her, learn from the experience.....& move on! Date/dont date, it doesn't really matter. You will when you are ready.

That....my friend....is the difference between being a responsible adult, & a stalker with a AVO.

I have to agree with this, especially the part with people over thinking their relationships and believing that the current relationship will last for ever and be 'the one'. I see a lot of people do that and it usually doesn't end well. If your enjoying the relationship, thats good but just go with it and enjoy it while it lasts.